Judgement

How dare you sit there in judgement of me.  Don’t you know there is only One that can judge me?

I don’t have to answer to you.

I don’t care what you think.

You can’t hurt me.

Tough words, huh?

Too bad I don’t believe them.

I sit in judgement of myself.  I look in the mirror and see how desperately broken I am.  I don’t know who I am.  I don’t know what I want.  How dare I let anyone else bring me further down?

And yet I do.  I have pulled away from everyone.  Every friend I have.  Even my closest.  I trust no one.  My own brother won’t reach out to me.  I hear it is because he “doesn’t know what to say.”  How about something alone the lines of “How are you?”

It doesn’t take much to hurt me these days. A wrong look or an innocent enough comment is enough to undo any progress I’ve made with myself.

You can ask me how I’m doing.  Just be prepared for me to lie.  I’ve tried the honesty route.

So, piece number one of my jagged mirror examined. I will no longer look at people and judge without knowing the facts. As others are currently doing to me.

In order to work on myself I have to work on how I treat others if I expect others to treat me better.

I challenge all of you to do the same.